HYDE - The Venting Thread

[Marie-Cris]

I failed at Year 11 Maths'. I chose not to do it in Year 12 and pretty much coasted XD

I'm not particularly happy today. In the on-going search to find out what the hell is wrong with me, I spend 4 hours with a needle tube in my arm this morning, with blood being drawn every half hour (followed by an injection of salt water, which felt weird). I'd had to fast this morning so I had to bring my breakfast in, and the dinky little spoon in my carry container from Kathmandu (I love it, bar the fact that the spoon sucks and sometimes when the meal inside is too hot it expands and makes it impossible to open ... but apart from that, it's ... blue.) wasn't much help. My BS Level spiked up to 8.2 then dropped steadily, and they finally let me stop when I burst into tears at 3.2.

I'm so very glad we'd made lunches the night before (we've been having a steady menu of lettuce, cucumber, avocado, mayonnaise [well, that's a new addition] and cold chunks of roasted pig meat with crackling wrapped in rhye mountain bread ... so good!). Tear into it ferociously.

However, the nurse that had been attending me went on her lunch break as I was eating lunch, and the guy that was left in charge was handling someone's drip by the time I left, so I had no one to tell me if I'd find out any results at all or anything. I could have waited around, but by that time the sub-zero conditions of the hospital were not being too kindly to my already frozen body.

And now I'm once again using a computer in the TeaNet, being charged $3 an hour to use a heap of junk that only recently got firefox (and an OLD version at that) and refuse to download the latest version of flash, leaving some of my other internet haunts looking like crap.

Thanks TeaNet.

(But on the plus side, since I've had a bad day, Fred let me get a copy of Skulduggery. Admittedly I'm not up to Mortal Coil yet, and the back cover has a hard crease, but for $7.99, it's a steal)

[tori2210]

I have to take Math with Calculus in year 12 next year and then in year 13. It's gonna suck but I need it if I wanna do engineering. Ah well.
I hope you find out whats up Mar, sounds nasty having all that stuff done at the hospital.

(I never really got into the SP series. Got up to Playing With Fire and was bored.)

Little Shop of Horrors is over now. I has a sad. It was amazing fun and the show and cast were incredible. I'm gonna miss it alot. And on top of that I didn't get to attend our last show. Apparently they mentioned my name too in a list of thank yous.

On the flipside, we've pretty much decided we can't afford to go to America in April. Which means one thing: Australia. Hopefully. And that also means one thing: Annie. And that means only one thing: Ant. So if I cross all my fingers and toes I might get to go to see Annie if we go to Aussie for the holidays. WOOT!

[Fredus]

I'm sorry I've been gone for so long, guys. For that matter, I'm not going to guarantee that I'll be around lots now, but I'll drift through a little more.

Marie-Cris, thanks for the Cricket tribute. It made me cry when I read it, but it's very fitting. My beautiful little boy - there's still a gaping hole in our live where he was.

[Fredus]

GAH!

My bonehead of a brother-in-law has gotten it into his head that he could move me cheaper than a removalist can and he's been nagging for the last seven hours.

For a start, the quotes I've gotten so far are only about $200 more than it would be for him to fly over, hire a truck and lug my stuff all the way back; and as far as I'm concerned, that amount of money is worth it for not having to carry all my stuff outside to a truck.

Secondly, neither Marie-Cris nor myself would be capable off the strength needed to assist in carrying some of the big stuff. At least, we could probably move the fridge or the couch, but then we wouldn't be much help with anything else.

Thirdly, I'm drowning in stress right now, everything has been a million times more difficult since losing Cricket, and I just want to hand the furniture over to the removalists so I don't have to worry about it anymore until it's time to move into our next house.

Fourthly, if we were moving our stuff without removalists, my father would feel obligated to help. As he's waiting for a hip replacement (reconstruction? Whatever...), which will be happening in a month or two, he is not physically capable, but would force himself anyway.

Fifthly, I do not like my brother-in-law. I don't want to feel I owe him anything. I don't want him in my house. I don't want him touching my stuff. I definitely don't want him moving the rather fragile dressing table that my great aunt left me when she died some twenty-odd years ago.

And... I'm sorry for the rant, but he's making me very angry, and I have nowhere else to complain. Poor Marie-Cris has already had to listen to me ranting too much lately.

[Marie-Cris]

It's times like that when I wish I knew how to politely tell someone to fk off without treading on too many sensitive toes.

And then I think: Laissez-moi la baise seule chienne.

Not you, honey, obviously.

[jayko]

Just tell him that Mar's parents booked a removalist as a gift to help you guys and that it is already paid for or something. It would be a lot easier for you to just hire someone, and easier for him!

[Marie-Cris]

...

YOU ARE SO SMART!

I'm going to have to nudge Fred back this way to see that.

[Fredus]

.... that is a good plan. It means I'll have to stop complaining about things on Facebook though.

[jayko]

My job has made it easy for me to come up with lies on the spot. I don't know if that is really a good thing or not... XD

At least that will be one less thing to stress about! When do you have to resign?

[Fredus]

Resigning on the 23rd, which I'm absolutely petrified about. My bosses scare the hell out of me. I console myself with the thought that everyone else I work with has known I'm moving for months, and they'll all back me up if need be. Well, they'll back me up as long as it doesn't affect them. It's very much an every person for themselves kind of workplace.

On the upside, I told my brother-in-law yesterday that I needed a couple of days to think about the options - planning to bring your plan into action tomorrow; but my parents sent me a message this morning and told me that they'd told him (complicated...), that they'd found me a backload from Albury which was cheap. Which they haven't, but now he's stopped nagging me.
It's funny... they like him as little as I do, and spontaneously came up with their own lie. My parents rock.

[jayko]

Don't stress about the job, be happy that you will be getting out of there! Lie if you have to to make it as though you have no other choice but to resign. Family emergency, something like that. What is it that you think they will say/do that you are worried about? I mean, you are giving them 2 weeks notice, they should be happy at least about that because it gives them time to find someone else.

[Fredus]

I'm going to tell them my Dad will be having a hip replacement in a couple of months (which is even true!), and that I want to be there to help Mum when that happens.

You know, I'm not even sure what I'm scared of. It's just that I've seen other people leave this job and as soon as they give notice, they magically become enemies of the bosses - which means they get whined at a lot, given bad jobs and a lot of sarcastic remarks are thrown their way. It's just that ... I really, really suck at any kind of confrontation. I guess I'm afraid that when I give notice they'll get nasty to my face and then I'll collapse. I don't want to let the bastards make me cry. Again.

If they try to tell me I'm supposed to give more notice, I'll be all ready to tell them that I'm casual and don't actually have to give notice at all.

[jayko]

You don't need to confront them if you don't feel comfortable doing that. Just be the bigger person and walk away. You don't deserve to be treated that way and you are the one with the power. You can always just leave and not go back.

[Fredus]

My sister was telling me that too... yet I'm still scared.

When it comes to it, I'll have myself all psyched up so that if they start getting nasty, I'll stand up and walk away. Pack my tools and get out of there, if need be. It's just the anticipation... I think I worry too much about things.

On the upside, we packed heaps of boxes this morning. It still looks like we haven't packed anything, but at least we're slowly getting through it all.

[Marie-Cris]

There's so much ...

[Fredus]

And we haven't even started the books yet. That's going to take a lot of boxes.

[mazza]

Fred
Would writing a letter of resignation be easier? You can compose everything you want to say. Get everything straight in your head and you can rewrite as many times as you like.

[Fredus]

I have considered that... but it's rather difficult when we're such a small business. If I give it to them, they'll just be in my face asking why I didn't just say it... and I can't just bail and leave the note on my way out, because it'd be pretty obvious I was leaving when I started packing my tools.

*sigh*

Thanks for the thought though.

[Fredus]

Packing sucks. A lot. I'm tired, the house looks like I haven't packed a thing - despite the mountain of boxes in the spare room, we're running out of boxes and tape and time.

And I'm sick of packing.

Did I mention how much I hate packing?

[Fredus]

This is me venting three times in a row... sorry.

Anyway, one of my friends from high school... we've not been quite as close for a long while because she's been in Sydney for ten years and I've been everywhere but, yet I thought we were still good friends nonetheless... she was pregnant. Yesterday she had a baby boy - and I found out this afternoon because I happened to see it on Facebook.

I know it's not that big a deal, but ... it hurt a fair bit. I know she messaged our other friend from high school.... *sigh*

[Marie-Cris]

I don't know if you're feeling up to ranting about it, but since he's not on this site ((and so help me, if he does I'll block him immediately!)), and since I'm rather pissed off about it too, I call dibs.

Fred's brother in law picked a bad day to pick a fight. He sent Fred a text this morning ((most likely a mass message)) to invite us to his and Fred's neice's joint birthday party on the 11th of Feb. We sent an apology back, saying we couldn't make it because we would be visiting my parents in Waikerie at the time.

That's when the st hit the fan.

((Our plan for the next couple of weeks, BTW, is to have our stuff moved out on the 6th, clean and leave this joint on the 7th, and spend a week at my folk's place, since this is the last time I'll be living in this state for a while and dad's health hasn't been the best ... I want to spend a good amount of time with them before we continue on to Albury.))

He wrote back ((and I quote)) : "Not surprised - it is only us afterall."

Let me give you a bit of history on this man. For the past month, this guy has been continually trying to convince us that we should accept his gracious offer for him to fly over here and move our furniture to Albury. Nice gesture, yes. However, considering that the last time Fred moved he left behind an antique piece that was part of her nana's hallway table; and the fact that if he moved us we would not have the security of being moved by a big company; and we would have him roaming through our house, touching our stuff, and we would have to help him lift things beyond our physical capabilities; and since he kept on pestering and pestering and pestering and pestering and pestering and pestering and pestering; and even sent his "bargain" e-mail not only to Fred but to her parent's and one of her brother's, most likely to get them to convince Fred to choose him over a professional team whose company has been moving furniture since long before any of us were born ... we said no.

I could go on about he constantly tries to guilt trip us into doing what he wants us to do, since he saved our necks during the big move to Adelaide; about how he and his lot have never called Fred once since coming here, then bitch about us not being able to visit them on the other side of the country; about how they never even spent the 3 hours to drive to Merimbula for Fred's last birthday up there, a week before the move, because the kids had been swimming that week and were tired; but I won't.

Just know that he's a vile man with a nasty temper. ((He's possibly also secretly gay and most likely only married because his brother called him gay. Not relevent, but it helps with the image of one of the gayest "straight" men we know.))

Now, considering our stress-wracked minds are playing havoc with our emotions over this whole packing business, we lashed back.

"Fine. We’ll race out there instead of visiting Marie-Cris’s dying father. Shall we? Bypass possibly the last chance she’ll ever get to see him before he’s sent to the hospital for the last time. Don’t judge my decisions if you can’t be bothered to listen to my reasons."

Okay, I confess: That was my handiwork. I make it no secret that I can't stand the man, and with everything that's happening, I snapped.

This launched them into a full-scale txt war, with him constantly trying to guilt trip ((as usual)), and Fred fighting back and explaining yet again why we've had to miss things like her new nephew's Christening and so forth. Words were said. Mums were mentioned. ((Well, Fred's mum, and her dad. And only once. Only to get him to ask them about something.)) It was nasty.

Even when Fred finished her end of the argument, he kept on going. Txt after txt after txt.

---

Okay. I seem to have calmed down a bit. It's been a rather stressful day, and we didn't need any of that adding to it.

The good news is that it finally gave me an excuse to get him the fk off my FaceBook.

[jayko]

He sounds like a real asshole... can't believe how much grief he has caused the two of you!

[Marie-Cris]

Yes. Yes he is.

[Fredus]

I just don't understand what he thinks he's going to gain by this. And the wonderful timing... seriously, I am so far past my breaking point right now that last night I cried for an hour because I failed a level in Plants vs. Zombies; I'm at the point of crying at games that usually make me laugh even while I'm dying... and he charges in and throws rubbish like this in my direction. I suck at confrontation at the best of times, so this morning the whole thing made me feel nauseous and my hands were shaking so hard that, after about his third text, Marie-Cris actually had to steady my hands so I didn't drop my phone.

I'm just hoping that he was being his usual underhanded self and throwing this nastiness at me behind everyone else's backs... because if my sister was sitting there knowing what he was writing to me ... well, she's changed enough over the years that she's already a long shot from the sister I used to worship when I was little, but if she knew about this... well, that'd pretty much ruin the tattered remnants of our relationship.

Maybe he's just a bully. Likes to kick people when they're down... actually, that does sound kind of like him. He did make a point of telling me I was fat once, and he does tend to the underhanded side of things. I told one of my brothers what he did today... maybe I should talk about it to my eldest brother. He tends to get very protective of me, so it might be worthwhile seeing what he thinks.

This is all too hard.

[jayko]

It is horrible because it is family and makes it much harder to deal with. If it was just a friend it would be easy to just end the friendship and be done with it. But you need to talk to your sister about it and tell her that it is just not on for him to speak to you that way. If she agrees with him, well it is a shame because family should be there for each other, but you should let her know how disapointed you are in the whole situation and in his actions.

I would definitely let your family know, including your parents, because it really is bullying and they need to know about it. And don't entertain him wih any more contact. Delete him from your phone and your life, as much as you can.

[Injeanious]

I agree totally with Jayko. Block his calls, from Facebook, anywhere else he might be able to get hold of you. I don't have any "official" inlaws now that I am divorced, but my ex-brother in law - even after nearly 10 years - still sends me "funny" emails usually videos which are extremely large. It is not the fact that I don't find the emails funny at all, it is the fact that he knows I am on dial-up and large emails crash my computer. Yet it doesn't matter how many times I ask him not to send me anything, and my daughters and even my ex-husband have asked him the same thing, the emails keep coming. I know this is nothing compared to the grief Fredus is getting but there is just something about men (some, not all) they just don't "get it". My sister's new husband whom she had been living with for some time, he had an affair with a young woman at least 30 years younger than Jill, and after a couple of years of being by herself Jill decided to take him back and then they got married. Mug. Anyway I rang Jill a few weeks ago and Bruck answered and I said hi and asked him if his gorgeous wife was there. He said no but my short fat ugly wife is. Well he thought it was hilarious, but I didn't.

[Marie-Cris]

... why is it that some people are just pigs.

Inj ... that's horrible. Isn't there anyway you can just block his e-mail address? I think hotmail has that option.